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Three characteristics of intimacy are fantastic in marriage but disastrous outside of that covenant: 1) sex (and many things leading up to sex) are addicting, 2) hormones were designed to put fuel on the fire, and 3) we’re often led into intimacy by the guy we’re with.If a girl allows a guy access to her body, those hormones we talked about earlier kick in and completely override his better sense.Before you ever have the boundaries conversation with your other half, you need to clearly define your own boundaries.Once you enter a relationship, well at least once I did, I realized there is a lot more physical interaction between kissing and sex.But first, there’s something I really, really need you to hear: This post is not meant to shame you if you’ve already make sinned—big or small—with a guy. I’m not talking about the kind of mild-mannered, easily-overcome addiction I have to a certain raspberry chocolate-chip gelato right now.Trust me—I’ve been there, and I have nothing but love and compassion for you and your situation. I’m talking about a physical addiction that comes from things like drugs more often than ice cream.We told each other our physical boundaries and the emotional connections to those choices. That doesn’t mean I knew everything about him; I knew his views on sex.
About a month in to our relationship, I decided I really needed to talk to my guy. We were lingering beside my car and we discussed our thoughts on purity. A few of you posted comments asking why we couldn’t just stop the physical side of our relationship instead of having to break up. ” where I shared that my heart got shattered when I broke things off with a guy I had been dating married-style.— because 1) sex (and many things leading up to sex) are addicting, 2) because our hormones were designed to put fuel on the fire, and 3) because we’re often led into intimacy by the guy we’re with.All three of those characteristics of intimacy are in a compromising physical relationship with a guy, take a good long look at your attempts to “do better” and be honest with yourself.
Are you caught in a cycle of addiction and broken boundaries?